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ONTD Original: "I Don't Know Her"

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"I don't know her."
"I still don't know her."
"I don't know her either."


The iconic "I don't know her (2003)" by Mariah was popularized in the mid-2000s within stan community, and caught on with newcomer stan groups later on. This phrase garnered mainstream attention since Mimi was frequently asked about alleged peers who may or may not allegedly have had the management support to take artistic ideas from certain artists or sing hooks of certain rap and r&b collaborations when it was trendy. The truth is Mariah is a songwriter first, who demo'd tracks since she was 18... and what other people compared to her do is totally different.

It's sometimes safer to play nice in regards to people who are brought to your attention, and other times you are genuinely not familiar or properly acquainted with them. Inspired by legendary user and influencer stewie_e, we will use a rating system for these 6 celebrities who were inquired about other celebrities, and see what levels of petty were given. Sometimes we #spread our wings and #prepare to fly, and inadvertently our wings will cast a nice #shade under the light.

6. J*stin Bieber on Shawn Mendes

Notes: Does this one Ontario native know the other?

Radio host: "Do you look at a kid like Shawn Mendes and think 'I was going through what he was going through now?'"

JB: "(turns to publicists) Who's Shawn Mendes...?"

Radio host: "...He's got a song called "Stitches" doing well on pop radio."

JB: "Nice nice... good for him."

PettoMeter: 🦋 🦋/10
Maybe he was not having it that day, but it did sound like he did not know who Shawn was. Not a lot of petty, at the same time it could've been a shady remark with how popular "Stitches" was (still Shawn was more of a nobody then).



5. Gabrielle Union on St*cey Dash

Notes: Dionne has a long history of nuBlack Republican antics, especially when she declared how platforms like BET is regressive to black representation in entertainment. Anti-aging vampire Gabby had a response when being questioned about the Clueless tv personality.

Gabby: "Is she like related to Damon Dash?
Was she on Rockefeller?...
I heard of a crazy lady once, maybe last week...
"

PettoMeter: 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋/10
Petty performative unawareness check, referring to the person as something else check, and a classy clock by bringing back the important subject. She knew, she didn't care.


4. *ggy on H*lsey

Notes: This is black on black crime between two very gifted musicians. Does anyone really win?

Halsey called Azalea a "moron" and accused her of appropriating black culture, adding "I watched her career dissolve and it fascinated me."

Iggy said: "To me, because I'm a famous person and I know a lot of the time people have opinions and they're not always accurate, I really try very hard not to give my personal opinions about people that I don't know. I don't know her, I've never met her.

I thought it was a bit of a strange thing to throw that out there," Iggy continued. "She's young and I hope she learns maybe to be a bit less judgmental when she's kind of in the same shoes. I'm sure she's getting judged all the time as well by people who don't really know her. Maybe it'd be good for her to try to be a little more empathetic to other people that are in the same situation...I don't really think I had anything to do with it.
"

PettoMeter: 🦋 🦋 🦋/10
H*lsey was dominating the charts with the ear-grating "Closer" at the time, but not everyone might've known her as an artist. *ggy's response was relatively formal, and she was giving cute advice as one public person to another.


3. Jhonni Blaze on Az*alia Banks

Notes: Jhonni of Love & Hip Hop NY had a few names to address, including Orlando Brown and Azealia Banks in this particular interview.

Jhonni: "What is that?
They found that new animal in Africa that got that new flu...
... is that an animal or something?
This is a human?
Like it breathes?

Never heard of it...
"

PettoMeter: 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋/10
PEAK petty... the lil exchange between the interviewer... Sis spent a good minute with improv creative writing in her response, alluding to her mishearing 'Azealia Banks' as the 'zika' virus. She eventually addressed Azealia, the person, and the drama inflicted between them.


2. Christina Aguilera on Lady Gaga

Notes: Xtina was giving a quick interview about her greatest hits album, and coming up 10 years. Comparisons between her and Gaga after her 2008 VMA performance infamously catapulted then.

Interviewer: "What do you say to those on the Internet who are hinting that you borrowed Lady Gaga’s look?"

Xtina: "You know, that’s funny that you mention that. This person [Lady Gaga] was just brought to my attention not too long ago. I’m not quite sure who this person is, to be honest. I don’t know if it is a man or a woman. I just wasn’t sure. I really don’t spend any time on the Internet, so I guess I live a little under a rock in that respect."

PettoMeter: 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋 🦋/10
The real tea is that Gaga WAS a new artist at the time that not everyone knew, and Just Dance did not hit number one until a few months later. Now if you would've heard the name "Lady Gaga," it does sound it could have been a drag name, so Xtina genuinely might've not known about her, and gave the open-ended oblivious 'man or a woman' comment. BUT the unassuming/self deprecating "I guess I live a little under a rock" was a very Mariah style petty (re: "Apparently I'm very forgetful.").

The "man or woman" idea eventually refueled the public with an obscure concert clip of Gaga appearing to have a bulge during a performance. Gaga referenced the hermaphrodite rumors in the "Telephone" music video, in which we will die hoping will get a resolved sequel.


1. Mariah Carey on Demi Lovato

Notes: You do know that Mariah has to be on her own list. Countless times from Mariah I could mention but I'll just mention the following. Mariah played this "Does! She! Know! Her!?" game, and we got to feel her honest response to several names delivered.

Demi: "Mariah's a legend and she's so talented but she disses people, it's nasty the way she treats J*nnifer."

Mariah's response: "I don't know her either... She should come up, introduce herself to me, say 'here's my opinion - what do you think about it?'That's how you handle shit, okay?"

PettoMeter: 🐛/10
No pettiness, no lil shrug, no dodging around the question, no imaginative story. You just gotta be upfront when you don't know someone and they're rude out of nowhere. This does not have anything on the pettometer, so I rate this caterpillar. Who knows what sources Demi was referring to when she made her public opinion about Mariah and the other artist. And if she was scouring shady diva moments online, it would have been nice if she did a little #herstory research as to where these riffs between divas are rooted.

This is not the only time Demi had something to say about Mimi when she made a comment on Instagram regarding a meme between Ari and Mariah.


However you want to approach it, Mariah Carey taught us that there are four ways to address people you don't know when asked:

1. In a blindly encouraging, but vague fashion


2. In a way to still acknowledge unidentified, said person


3. In solipsist wonderment


4. Point blank


tyfyt - badtz_m




Sources: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / me_Madonna.gif

#FlashbackFriday: 5 Recent Indie Songs Interpolating Hits

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I can't help but being taken aback when these indie songs randomly use a good chunk of music from familiar hits. Some of these songs range from "contains elements of" to using multiple verses, but still including different lyrics.

Do you think you can guess the songs by listening to them?


5. Right On Time by Jojo (2015)


"I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis

Part used from the original:
Say you love, love me forever
Never stop, I'm there for whatever
Near and far, you're always everywhere and everything


Notes: Yes I know this is still a 'major label' release but Jojo has been rebirthed into indie pop and r&b status tbh. wendy_williams_hat.gif


4. Back For More by Glassio (2018)


"Heaven" by Bryan Adams

Part used from the original:
But that's over now

You keep me comin' back for more


Notes: This band used most of the melody and changed the words and it took me a minute as to why it was so familiar. Lettuce not forget the iconic trance DJ Sammy version.

3. Where U Are by Rina Sawayama (2017)


"I Wanna Be Where You Are" by The Jackson 5

Part used from the original:
Can it be I stayed away too long

Did I leave your mind when I was gone

It's not my thing trying to get back

But this time let me tell you where I'm at


Notes: A kind of obvious one.

2. Down For You by Kehlani & BJ The Chicago Kid (2015)


"Just Friends" by Musiq Soulchild

Part used from the original:
Maybe we can oh

Go and see a movie girl

Or maybe we can hang out girl

Whatever you want to do

Just let me know

It's up to you


Notes: Kehlani was indie for this mixtape, and yes she might be too obvious of an example as she does this in her songs quite often.

1. All That We Had Is Lost by Postiljonen (2014)


"How Will I Know" by Whitney Houston

Part used from the original:
There's a boy I know, he's the one I dream of

Looks into my eyes, takes me to the clouds above, mmm-hmm

Oh, I lose control, can't seem to get enough

When I wake from dreaming, tell me is it really love

--

Oh, wake me, I'm shaking, wish I had you near me now, uh-huh

Said there's no mistaking, what I feel is really love


Notes: Wig when I recognized this in this hazy ambient song.


Happy Friday! What indie songs give you the throwback feels?


Sources: 1234

ONTD Original: Bops That Almost Went to Other Artists

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Today marks the long-delayed (if not really awaited by more than a few) release of Tinashe Kachingwe's sophomore album 'Joyride,' a project that faced an almost mythic amount of obstacles since its announcement in September 2015. In the interim, the "2 On" singer released a string of vision-compromising singles, was frustrated to the point of tears on more than one occasion, and lost the title track of her album to pop juggernaut Rihanna.

Fortunately for Tinashe, the album for which "Joyride" was snatched up (2016's 'Anti') saw its own share of delays and revisions, and she was able to reclaim the song. Hearing it after all the buzz and controversy, though, it's hard not to long for Rihanna's interpretation to leak, and harder still to believe that the song wasn't written with her in mind all along.

"Joyride" is hardly the first instance in which a song released by one pop star was written for or recorded by another before being given a pass. Below, a few more cases of pop sloppy seconds and second thoughts.

"Graffiti My Soul"

Released by: Girls Aloud
Intended for: Britney Spears
Praised as one of the highlights of British girl group Girls Aloud's sophomore album 'What Will the Neighbours Say?' (2004), this Xenomania production boasts an ingenious Peplab sample and drew comparisons to the innovative early-2000s sounds of Madonna and The Prodigy. What you may not know is that the song was originally pitched to Team Britney during the sessions for what was arguably Spears' most ambitious project to that point, 2003's eclectic 'In the Zone.' Jive Records loved it, and Britney even recorded a demo - GA member Cheryl recalled Spears' delivery of the line You dream of touching me there being "strange" and "freak[ing] [her] out" - but it was ultimately passed on in favor of the career-defining "Toxic."

"Dim All the Lights"

Released by: Donna Summer
Intended for: Rod Stewart
The third single off of the late Queen of Disco's best-selling album 'Bad Girls' (her seventh!) almost never was. Believe it or not Summer, who has sole songwriting credit on "Dim All the Lights," originally intended to give the song to Rod the Mod (this nickname was news to me too). Something inside told her to keep it, though, and it would become the third top five single off of its mother album, peaking at #2. Another fun fact: "Dim All the Lights" is noteworthy for containing a note sustained by Summer for a total of 16 seconds.

"Black Widow"

Released by: Iggy Azalea featuring Rita Ora
Intended for: Katy Perry
Somehow it was entirely unsurprising to me to learn that Iggy and Katy are/were friends, but I somehow missed the fact that Iggy's last real hit was a 'Prism' (2013) leftover. The white witches met via a mutual acquaintance at Island Records and became bosom buddies, but attempts at collaboration proved unsuccessful. When Iggy heard "Black Widow" and learned that it had been finalized too late to be included on her sis' junior slump, she fought to win it from another (unknown) artist that was set to record it and added her... verses. Rita, as per usual, was an afterthought, and took over for Perry singing the hook she had written. The song peaked at #3 on the Hot 100, and none of the artists involved were seen or heard from again.

"Boom Clap"

Released by: Charli XCX
Intended for: Charli XCX (stay with me), Hilary Duff
The unofficial theme song from 2014's 'The Fault in Our Stars' sat on the shelf for some time before being included on the film's soundtrack (as well as Charli's sophomore album 'Sucker,' also released that year). Originally composed during the writing sessions for 'True Romance' (2013), the song failed to make the cut. It was then offered to Hilary Duff for what would become 2015's 'Breathe In. Breathe Out.' Duff claimed to never have heard the song, and Charli told V Magazine that Duff's people rejected it for not being "cool enough" for the former Disney Channel star: "So I was like, 'Fuck it. I'm going to sing it.'"

"I'm a Slave 4 U"

Released by: Britney Spears
Intended for: Janet Jackson
Britney Spears has commonly been considered the Princess to Madonna's Queen of Pop, but more than a fair share of her critics and fans have argued that she owes more to Janet Jackson than the Material Girl. Truth be told, she owes one of her most iconic singles to Damita Jo: the Neptunes pitched "I'm a Slave 4 U" to Jackson for 2001's 'All for You,' and an unreleased demo allegedly exists. Ultimately, however, the track went to Britney and changed the public perception of teen pop's reigning Lolita forever, for better or for worse.

Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
Videos: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
Chart positions via Billboard

there have been a few posts like this but surprisingly none of them included these!

From Victoria to Kate: British Royal Brides and Their Gowns (ONTD Original)

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In honor of the upcoming nuptials of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, here's a look back at notable British royal brides and the looks they chose for their big days.

Queen Victoria began today’s custom of brides wearing white when she chose this gown, designed by William Dyce and made by seamstress Mary Bettans, to wed her first cousin Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg on February 10, 1840:


Victoria’s great-grandson Edward VIII abdicated his throne after less than a year to marry “the woman I love”, twice-divorced American Wallis Simpson. They were given the titles of Duke and Duchess of Windsor and married in Paris, where they would live the rest of their lives, on June 3, 1937.

American couturier Mainbocher made the Duchess’ wedding gown in what he dubbed “Wallis Blue”, to match her eyes. Unfortunately, an instability in the dye later caused the gown to lose all of its color, so it is displayed today next to an exact replica in the original shade.


Princess Elizabeth (now known as Queen Elizabeth II), wed her second cousin once removed, Prince Philip of Greece and Denmark, on November 20, 1947.

Her gown, by Sir Norman Hartnell, was purchased with rationing coupons because Britain was still suffering severe shortages post-World War II. It was displayed for the couple's 70th wedding anniversary in 2017, having noticeably yellowed with age:


Queen Elizabeth's younger sister Princess Margaret was the first British royal (but hardly the last) to divorce in the 20th century. Like her sister, she wore a gown by Sir Norman Hartnell at her wedding to photographer Antony Armstrong-Jones on May 6, 1960. They divorced in 1978:


Katharine Worsley became the Duchess of Kent upon marrying the Queen's first cousin, Prince Edward of Kent, on June 8, 1961. She wore a gown by John Cavanagh.


The Queen's first cousin, Princess Alexandra, married businessman Angus Ogilvy on April 24, 1963. She wore an all-lace gown (and a matching veil done in the same lace) designed by John Cavanagh.

Shortly after the wedding, the royal newlyweds were caught by a paparazzo having sex in a field, and although the Palace made sure the photographs were never published, they quickly became the stuff of legend.


Princess Anne, the only daughter of Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, wed army captain Mark Phillips on November 14, 1973, wearing a gown by Maureen Baker. The couple divorced in 1992, and Anne later remarried to her mother's equerry.


Love it or hate it, who could forget the gown that 20-year-old Lady Diana Spencer wore when she wed Prince Charles on July 29, 1981 and became Diana, Princess of Wales? Designed by David and Elizabeth Emanuel, it was the ultimate '80s gown, featuring huge ruffles, giant puffed sleeves and a 25-foot train.

The marriage ended in an acrimonious separation in 1992 and divorce in 1996, only one year before Diana's death in a Paris car crash at age 36.


Prince Charles finally married his longtime mistress, Camilla Parker-Bowles on April 9, 2005. The new Duchess of Cornwall changed from the simple, short white dress and coat that she wore to the private civil ceremony into this grey-and-gold floor-length silk coat over a matching dress ensemble, worn for the blessing afterward. It was designed by the duo of Antonia Robinson and Anna Valentine and she accessorized it with a spray of gold feathers in her hair (which the press rather unkindly suggested looked like straw).


Sarah Ferguson wed the Queen's second son, Prince Andrew, on July 23, 1986, and they took the titles Duke and Duchess of York. She wore a gown by Lindka Cierach. The couple separated in 1992 and divorced in 1996:


Sophie Rhys-Jones married Prince Edward, the youngest child of Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip, on June 19, 1999. She wore a simple satin gown and silk coat by Samantha Shaw and a black-and-white pearl cross necklace designed by her new husband. They are now known as the Earl and Countess of Wessex, and as of 2018, Edward is the only one of the Queen's children not to have gotten a divorce.


The Duke and Duchess of Kent's daughter, Lady Helen Windsor (who had been nicknamed "Melons" by the tabloids for her ample bosom) married art dealer Timothy Taylor on July 18, 1992. She wore a gown by Princess Diana's favorite designer, Catherine Walker.


Princess Margaret's son David Armstrong-Jones, now the Earl of Snowdon and a renowned maker of luxury furniture, wed Serena Stanhope on October 8, 1993. The bride wore a gown by Bruce Bobbins that many people felt resembled her new mother-in-law's own 1960 wedding dress (above):


Princess Margaret's daughter, Lady Sarah Armstrong-Jones, wore Jasper Conran to wed actor Daniel Chatto (who had coincidentally played her cousin Prince Andrew in the US television special Charles and Diana: A Royal Love Story) on July 14, 1994.


The gown that Kate Middleton, now known as the Duchess of Cambridge, wore to marry Charles and Diana's elder son Prince William on April 29, 2011 was designed by Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen.


Sources: Royal Order of Sartorial Splendor/Me

Which of the British royal wedding gowns is your favorite, ONTD?

Do You Remember: Forgotten Male Pop Artists of 2000s

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So you got a collab with the biggest rappers. So you worked with the biggest hitmakers. *Shania voice* That don't impress me much.

But your little career run faded a little too soon in pop standards, and you're just no good anymore. We're familiar with pop girls who were very of their time, and we can't leave the fellas out either! Whether it's because male pop is inherently dry & beige and only can hold up for so long (counting down for Shawn and *d's time), these men range from one-hit-wonders to those who had a few hits to their name.


Jesse McCartney


You may also know: "Beautiful #Sole", "Because You Live"

Where are they now: Still with an active music career and dropped an album in 2014 which no one really knew about. He recently released a new single called "Better With You," but he still has a loyal #stan base!

Jay Sean


You may also know: "Down"

Where are they now: He left his label in 2014 due to difference in 'artistic direction' (code for you ain't making them money), so I'm assuming he's independent now. Since his late '00s run he's been featured on some DJ tracks.

Matt Pokora


You may also know: N/A

Where are they now: French Justin Timberlake released a few albums since and is taking notes of being a retired artist a la Xtina and is a judge on The Voice Kids France and The Voice: la plus belle voix.

Ryan Cabrera


You may also know: "True"

Where are they now: Ex-love of Ashlee Simpson, Lisa Origliasso from The Veronicas, and Audrina from The Hills works in a music collective called Beyond the Sky. I Googled him and think you can still catch him doing gigs and very small venues.

Sean Kingston

You may also know: "Take You There", "Fire Burnin'"

Where are they now: One of the more successful guy here, he's sporadically released singles and is working on a new album. He also thrives on features, but I don't know if we need his voice on the radio.

Kevin Rudolf


You may also know: N/A

Where are they now: Like Jay Sean, his contract with his label was up and now works as an independent artiist.

Colby O' Donis


You may also know: "Beautiful" (Akon), "Just Dance" (Lady Gaga)

Where are they now: I peeped his IG and he's been writing songs but still terribly under the radar... I don't know if he's booking gigs or anything.


ONTD why do you think MOC in pop have been disproportionately flopped in their careers?

Sources: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7

Celebrities That Were Caught Heckling NBA Players

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Unlike other sporting events, where the rich and the famous will hide away in their luxury boxes; at NBA games, celebrities actually want to be seen. For the small cost of thousands of dollars, celebs get the privilege of being seen (and heard) by the players on the court; leading to some memorable moments caught on tape. In honor of the NBA Playoffs starting today, here's a list of celebrities that were caught heckling a player:

Spike Lee vs Reggie Miller

What happened: In the 1994 Eastern Conference Finals, avid Knicks fan and trash-talker, Spike Lee, met his match in Reggie Miller. Miller was having a poor shooting night and it was only made worst by Lee’s jabs, particularly the ones about his sister - Cheryl Miller. (Cheryl was a legendary NCAA player and as the older sister of Reggie, she constantly casted a long shadow over him)
Did it help: No, Miller used Lee’s comments to fuel his motivation, proceeding to score 25 points within the 4th quarter. As the Pacers made their comeback, Miller started to taunt Lee right back; leading to the infamous chock sign and nut grab aimed at Lee and his wife. The NY Daily News’ headline the next day was “Thanks A Lot, Spike.”

Drake vs Justin Holiday

What Happened: In the end of a close game between Drake’s Toronto Raptors and the Chicago Bulls, Bull’s player Justin Holiday had 5 seconds to inbound the ball to his teammates when Drake started yapping in his ear.
Did it Help: Yes, Holiday failed to inbound the ball within the allocated time and the ball was turned over to the Raptors. (Though the Raptors did proceed to lose this game anyways)

Rihanna vs Kevin Durant

What Happened: In the 2017 Finals, Rihanna, a well-known LeBron fan; yelled “Brick” at the opposing team player, Durant, while he was in the middle of shooting a three.
Did it Work: No, Durant made the shot and proceeded to stare down Rihanna.

Jack Nicholson vs the Lakers

What Happened: Jack Nicholson (and Adam Sandler) the iconic Laker fan, voiced his disgust at his team's level of play by leaving the game early.
Did it Work: Well the Lakers haven't made the playoffs in the past five years...

Jimmy Buffett vs the Refs?

What Happened: During a close game between the Miami Heats and the NY Knicks, Jimmy Buffett (yes, that Jimmy Buffett) was ejected by the referee. Apparently, Heat fan Buffett is not as mellow as most people would think since the ref found Buffett use of profanities as enough reason to remove him.
Did it Work: Well the Heat did lose that game but Buffett can lord it over Lil Wayne that he was ejected first.

Source: 1234456

What was the best heckle you've heard aim at a player?

ONTD Original: This Was Britney and Christina Fashion

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I want to show appreciation to Britney and Christina's fashion senses during their early days, which was quintessential turn of the millennium teeny bopper popstar. It's funny that at one point, people saw this as another dark age for style (and lbr the early '00 was not a good time for 99% of celebs), but now we're at a place to reflect and appreciate all of its vibrant and tacky glory.

Here's a post showing a few moments that this style still lived on in the past decade, mostly through celebs like Charli XCX, Tinashe, Liz, and Rihanna. No, I'm not insinuating they started these trends that were of that time, but we're just gonna look back through their lens. *image heavy, probably not mobile-friendly post*


Colored tinted Glasses


Tinashe (2017), Drake (2016), Rina Sawayama (2017). Tinted glasses ARE back and even those type of glasses that are too small to be practical.


A cropped corset top


Charli XCX took cues for her "Doing It" music video.

Britney's oversized athleisure



LIZ (2013), Rihanna (2015). For when you're feeling very cool and interesting and 'urban'.

Christina's revealing slit moment

Tinashe (2018).

Super hero tank tops


Liz (2015).

Flames


I don't know if Guy Fieri should be accredited to the very graphic Hot Wheel flames when Britney wore it on her 'Oops!' tour in 2000. Rihanna (2017), LIZ (2015), and Kyl*e (2017) followed.

Bucket Hats


Kehlani (2017), LIZ (2015), Rihanna (2015). Schoolboy Q ain't got nothin on them.

Shiny, shiny ensembles



Charli (2014), Bebe Rexha (2016), and Tinashe (2017). Zenon is #quaking.

And bandana's...




Jorja Smith (2017), Tinashe (2016), Rihanna (2016), and Kylie Jenner (2016) pictured. Caution: this post does NOT encourage or is affiliated with gang activity.

An honorable mention to R*mney and Tr*mp supporter Trisha Paytas who, whether intentionally or not, can check off taking a few looks from Xtina's "Come On Over" music video.













And also Gaga when she took note of the early Christina + Britney silhouette in 2011




Fashion post? ONTD, what y2k styles are you incorporating into your wardrobe?

Sources: 1 / 2 / 3 / me

Royal Brides of the World and Their Wedding Gowns (An ONTD Original)

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The follow-up to Friday’s post: From Victoria to Kate: British Royal Brides and Their Gowns

While the British royals may be best-known to most Westerners, there are royal families in many countries around the world, and they all love a big wedding.

This list doesn’t begin to cover all royal weddings; as I realized when I started putting together a post about royal wedding gowns a week ago, Europe alone is practically bursting at the seams with bluebloods (hence the splitting off of Great Britain into its own post and the limiting of this one to the 1950s and after).

I've arranged them in alphabetical order by country and used a double cut to save browsers:


BELGIUM
Mathilde d'Udekem d'Acoz became Princess Mathilde, Duchess of Brabant when she wed Crown Prince Philippe, Duke of Brabant on December 4, 1999, and was one of the few winter brides among the royals of Europe. Her satin coat-and-dress combo was by Edouard Vermeulen.


BHUTAN
King Jigme Khesar Namgyel Wangchuck wed Jetsun Pema on October 13, 2011 at 8:20 a.m., the time set by royal astrologers. Jetsun chose her raw silk kira (the national dress for Bhutanese women) from among several made by prominent weavers in the country, while King Jigme wore the same rose-patterned gho that his father and grandfather had worn at their weddings.


DENMARK
Princess Margrethe, the future queen of Denmark, married French diplomat Count Henri de Laborde de Monpezat on June 10, 1967, wearing a gown by royal couturier Jørgen Bender. She pinned a diamond daisy brooch on the bodice (“Daisy” being her family’s nickname for her).

When the gown was displayed in Copenhagen in 2015, it appeared unembellished because the large piece of historic lace that had trimmed the front when she wore it had long since been removed to be used on other royal wedding dresses.


Prince Joachim, the younger of Queen Margrethe's two sons, met Alexandra Manley (left) in Hong Kong, where she was born and raised, and married her on November 18, 1995. The bride wore a gown by Jørgen Bender, who had designed her new mother-in-law's wedding gown 28 years earlier. They divorced in 2005.

Prince Joachim then got married for a second time, to Marie Cavallier (right) on May 4, 2008. The bride wore Arasa Morelli.


Crown Prince Frederik married Australian Mary Donaldson on May 14, 2004. Her gown, by Uffe Frank, reportedly had the wedding ring of her mother (who had died in 1997) stitched into the lining near her heart.


GERMANY
Prince Christian of Hanover (son of Ernst August, Prince of Hanover, and stepson of Monaco's Princess Caroline) wed lawyer and former model Alessandra de Osma in her native Peru last month, March 16, 2018. The bride wore Jorge Vázquez.


GREECE
Note: King Constantine II was deposed in 1967 and the monarchy was abolished in Greece in 1973, but the family continue to use their royal titles in exile.

Englishwoman Marie-Chantal Miller, the daughter of a billionaire, married King Constantine's eldest son Prince Pavlos in London on July 1, 1995. Marie-Chantal's Valentino gown reportedly cost $225,000 and took 25 people four months to complete by hand.


JAPAN
Crown Prince (now Emperor) Akihito wed Harvard-and-Oxford-educated Michiko Shōda, the first commoner ever to marry into the Japanese Imperial family, on April 10, 1959. Michiko's jūni-hitoe, which literally means 'twelve-layered garment', weighed 30 pounds and took nearly two hours to arrange properly. She wore a white gown for the traditional "First Audience" ceremony before her new mother-and-father-in-law later that day.


Crown Prince Naruhito, elder son of Emperor Akihito and Empress Michiko, married Harvard-and-Oxford-educated Masako Owada on June 9, 1993. Masako had been reluctant to give up her promising diplomatic career and turned down the persistent prince's first two proposals before finally agreeing to marry him. The jūni-hitoe she wore for the traditional Shinto ceremony cost more than $300,000 and was designed by Hanae Mori.

Sadly, Masako has been subjected to a great deal of criticism for failing to produce a male heir (she had a daughter, Aiko, in 2001, after experiencing an earlier miscarriage, but only males can ascend the Japanese throne) and, suffering from severe depression, has rarely been seen in public for over 15 years.


JORDAN
American-born Lisa Halaby would forever after be known as Queen Noor al-Hussein ("Light of Hussein") after she became King Hussein I's fourth wife on June 15, 1978. Her Bohemian '70s gown was by Dior.


King Hussein's eldest son, Prince Abdullah, proposed to Palestinian-born Rania al Yassin only two months after meeting her. They wed on June 10, 1993, with the bride in a gown by British designer Bruce Oldfield. They became King and Queen of Jordan in 1999.


LIECHTENSTEIN
Princess Margaretha of Luxembourg was well-covered in her Balmain gown when she married Prince Nikolaus of Liechtenstein on March 20, 1982. It was the last wedding to join two reigning royal houses of Europe, a practice that was once the standard for royal marriages.


It was the tail-end of the 80s and big shoulders were finally on their way out, but the Paris-born Princess Marie de France wasn't about to let them go without a fight. She married Prince Gundakar of Liechtenstein on July 29, 1989, amid a nasty family feud over the site of the wedding and who would walk her down the aisle that saw half of her family boycott the ceremony (and publicly urge other royals to do the same). I haven't been able to discover the designer of this gown, so if anyone knows, I'll add it to the post.


Panama-born Angela Brown became the first person of known African descent to marry into European royalty when she wed Prince Maximilian on January 29, 2000. The new Princess Angela, a graduate of New York’s famed Parsons School of Design, designed her own gown and accessorized it with her new in-laws' Kinsky Honeysuckle Tiara at the New York religious ceremony.


LUXEMBOURG
Prince Guillaume, Hereditary Grand Duke of Luxembourg, wed Countess Stéphanie de Lannoy of Belgium (left) on October 20, 2012, with the bride in Elie Saab.

Guillaume’s younger brother Prince Felix married German bioethics researcher Claire Lademacher (right) on September 21, 2013. Like her sister-in-law Princess Stephanie the year before, Claire chose Elie Saab to design her gown, and some critics found their looks a bit too similar.



MONACO
American film star Grace Kelly became Princess Grace when she wed Prince Rainier III of Monaco on April 19, 1956, wearing a gown by Hollywood costume designer Helen Rose, who had designed her outfits for the movies High Society and The Swan.

They remained married until Grace's tragic death in 1982, when she suffered a minor stroke while driving and lost control of her car, which plunged over the side of a steep mountain road.



Princess Grace and Prince Rainier's son, Prince Albert II, wed South African Olympic swimmer Charlene Wittstock on July 2, 2011. The new Princess Charlene wore Armani.


THE NETHERLANDS
For her February 2, 2002 wedding to Queen Beatrix's son, Crown Prince (now King) Willem-Alexander, Argentinean banker Máxima Zorreguieta chose a gown by Valentino. They became King and Queen upon Beatrix’ abdication in 2013.


Willem-Alexander’s little bro Prince Friso was struck from the royal line of succession for marrying Mabel Wisse Smit on April 24, 2004 without the consent of Parliament (the Dutch cabinet refused to seek such permission due to Mabel’s past as the girlfriend of a known Dutch drug lord, and the fact that they believed she lied when questioned about it). Friso and Mabel were later embarrassed when it was revealed that they themselves had been editing Mabel’s Wikipedia entry to gloss over her past.

Princess Mabel’s oft-mocked Viktor & Rolf wedding dress featured 248 crepe georgette bows, including a big old bunch weirdly placed on the end of the train. Prince Friso was buried in an avalanche while skiing in 2012 and slipped into a coma before dying a year later.


Prince Floris, the son of Princess Margriete, married Aimée Söhngen on October 22, 2005. Lidy de Joode designed the royal bride's minimalist gown.


NORWAY
Crown Prince Harald was expected to make a royal match with a European princess for his bride, but he fell in love with a commoner he met at a party, Sonja Haraldsen. For nine years, their relationship was something of an open secret as he rejected every suggestion for a royal bride. He reportedly finally gave his father, King Olav V, an ultimatum: if he couldn’t marry Sonja, he would stay single forever and therefore could never produce a legitimate heir.

Since Harald was the only male heir to the Norwegian throne, Olav relented and not only gave consent for the union, but walked Sonja down the aisle himself as a public show of support. Sonja wore a gown by Oslo clothing store Molstad at their wedding on August 29, 1968. They became King and Queen upon Olav’s death in 1991.


Mette-Marit Tjessem Høiby was an unexpected choice of bride for Harald and Sonja’s son, Crown Prince Haakon. Not only was the ex-waitress a commoner, but she was the single mother of a four-year-old son and she was forced to make a tearful public apology before the wedding for her party-girl past. Nonetheless, the couple wed on August 25, 2001, with Mette-Marit in a gown by Ove Harder Finseth.


PORTUGAL
Note: Like Greece, above, Portugal no longer has a monarchy, it having been dissolved in the 1910 revolution. But a number of Portuguese people from once-noble families continue to unofficially use their ancestral titles.
Dona Diana Álvares Pereira de Melo, the Duchess of Cadaval wed Prince Charles Philippe d'Orléans, a grandson of the Orleanist pretender to the French throne, Henri, on June 21, 2008. She wore Carolina Herrera.


SPAIN
Crown Prince (now King) Felipe wed television newswoman Letizia Ortiz on May 22, 2004, with the bride in a gown by Manuel Pertegaz that was embroidered with real gold.


SWEDEN
Even royals love a two-for-one bargain. Princess Birgitta had a gown made by Märtaskolan, a dressmaking school, for her wedding to Prince Johann Georg of Hohenzollern on May 25, 1961 (left). Three years later, Birgitta's younger sister Princess Désirée simply wore the same dress for her own June 5, 1964 wedding to Baron Niclas Silfverschiöld.


Crown Princess Victoria, the eldest of King Carl XVI Gustaf and Queen Silvia’s three offspring, wore Par Engsheden when she married her former personal trainer, Daniel Westling, on June 19, 2010. She accessorized with the pearl-and-gold Cameo Tiara, which was originally a gift from the Emperor Napoleon to his wife Josephine around 1809.

Because not only are the Swedes the hotties of European royalty, they also get the best tiaras.

Victoria’s younger sister Princess Madeleine married British-born American financier Christopher O’Neill on June 8, 2013. Her gown was designed by Valentino Garavani. She wore her favorite tiara, the diamond Modern Fringe (which can also be transformed into a necklace).


Sofia Heliqvist was a controversial choice of bride for King Carl and Queen Silvia’s only son, Prince Carl-Philippe, due to her career as a semi-nude model and reality show contestant. Nonetheless, the couple married on June 13, 2015, with the new Princess Sofia wearing a gown by Ida Sjöstedt. She showed off a generous wedding gift from her new in-laws: a new emerald-and-diamond tiara. The emeralds can be interchanged with pearls for a more subtle look.


Sources: Royal Order of Sartorial Splendor/Me

My favorite royal wedding gowns are those worn by Marie-Chantal of Greece and Maxima of the Netherlands. What are yours, ONTD?

ONTD Original: Five Times Celebs Snapped at People in Public

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Celebrities, they're just like us! Sometimes, they just want a day out and about without having to be hounded by the general public, fans, and chased by paparazzi when they don't call them on themselves. But such is the price to pay for fame. Today, we'll be rating five celebrities that snapped at the general public. Sometimes to fans, the paparazzi or even mouthy residents of a city to defend their big sister! I'm temporarily reviving MTV's Boiling Points here to measure just how red these celebs get - but we're not setting a time limit. We'll spin the concept into a BP thermometer and rate it. Shall we proceed?


Ian Somerhalder: “You guys, listen. No no, stop! Everybody listen! I love you guys, I'm not taking a single photo today. It's my day. Don't follow us. Please! I love you guys, you're so good to us. You're so awesome. Do not follow us okay? This is too much.”

BoilingPoint™ Rating:




Twink of Pop™ Shawn Mendes: “Because people like you! You sell this. Signatures! Yeah, so what'd you just tell me? Did you sell the signatures or not? [Man: No, it's for my sister] Say swear to god. So how old is your sister? And what's her name? Can you call your sister then for me?” And basically, this exchange goes on for a while longer but you get the idea.

BoilingPoint™ Rating:




Jamie Lynn Spears defending big sis Britney Spears:
Los Angeles Resident: “Nobody wants you in this neighborhood! You’re making the neighborhood unsafe!”
Jamie Lynn Spears: “Well then move the fuck out!”

The boiling point may be high, but it was for a good cause and to defend her big sis during a rough patch in her life. Jamie Lynn Spears is not the one to be trifled with.




BoilingPoint™ Rating:




Justin Bieber: Biebs doesn't say much. During his visit to Argentina, fans give the Biebs a flag from Argentina...he then throws it out the window. He may not have said much or verbally lost his cool here, but the disrespect is high and real.

BoilingPoint™ Rating:




Halsey: “Listen very quick, not for nothing but I'm getting a lot of really rude messages right now from people saying that I'm fucked up, that I swear you, and I'm being rude, and I'm being mean like not for nothing but, I've been in press since eight o'clock in the morning! I have a whole day of interviews to do, I'm still doing them. I would never just walk by you and not meet you so to abuse me like that online is kinda fucked up! I have a lot more interviews to do and I promise I'm going to meet people but please don't be mean to me! I have a very busy day too okay? So it really makes me upset, please don't be mean to me!”

Honestly, the good sis Halsey just wanted a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Fair enough.


BoilingPoint™ Rating:






Sources:1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

ONTD Original: 5 Coachella Performers You Should Have Checked Out (But Probably Didn't)

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Sprinkled among the big names of Coachella this year were some lesser known acts that put on a great show and introduced their sound to a much wider audience through the festival live stream. You might have missed their set for a number of reasons, but below are 5 great musicians that you should definitely check out the next time you get a chance:

1. Jacob Banks

Jacob Banks performed on the Mojave stage on day 3 of the festival. You might have missed him because his set time overlapped with Cardi B and Protugal. The Man.



What makes him special: Powerful vocals, great stage presence, a solid live band, and a ton of emotion!

Be sure to also check out:Chainsmoking and Unholy War.

Where you can catch him live next: He has a ton of upcoming shows, hitting cities like Chicago, Vancouver, Salt Lake City, Houston, and more! Check them out on his website here.



2. Tash Sultana

Tash Sultana performed on day 2 of the festival over on the Mojave stage. You might have missed her because her set took place at the same time as Tyler The Creator. The video below has 15 million views, so clearly there are a lot of people who are much more with it than I am:



What makes her special: A multi-instrumentalist (seriously, what doesn't she play?) who always looks like she's having a great time on stage.

Be sure to also check out:Her NPR Tiny Desk concert

Where you can catch her live next: A huge number of shows across Canada, the US, New Zealand, and Europe. Check out her tour dates here.

3. Ibeyi

Ibeyi performed Sunday, later in the day over on the Gobi stage. You might have missed them because of the later stage time (EST problems).



What makes them special: Multi-lingual songs, a great sound, an energetic and atmospheric stage presence, and wonderful vocals.

Be sure to also check out:Deathless

Where you can catch them live next: They only currently have a few more dates booked for The States (including Austin and Mexico City) but they're coming to Europe with a bunch of shows scheduled. Check out their tour dates here.

4. Alvvays

Alvvays performed on day 2 over on the Mojave stage. You might have missed them because their stage time overlapped with HAIM.



What makes them special: Dreamy indie pop bops performed well live with an ever so slight 90s vibe (but they don't overdo it on the nostalgic, 90s revival thing).

Be sure to also check out:In Undertow and Marry Me, Archie

Where you can catch them live next: Lots of upcoming shows scheduled for The US, Canada, and the UK. Check out their tour dates here.

5. Jungle

Jungle performed night 2 over on the Mojave stage. You might have missed them due to the late start time (which overlapped with David Byrne) or due to the fact that the tail end of their set coincided with the start of Beyoncé's (I know that this is the answer).


BTW, this is what an audience is supposed to look like, Coachella.

What makes them special: A bunch of people on stage making groovy tunes you can definitely dance and sing along to. They also have the rare experience of being constantly complimented by Noel Gallagher in the press.

Be sure to also check out:Their KEXP Performance.

Where you can catch them live next: They're headed to Europe before swinging back to North America for some shows in June. Check out their tour dates here.



Favourite overlooked performances this weekend?

SOURCES:1 / 2 / 3 / 4 | 5 / 6 / 7 | 8 / 9 / 10 | 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 | 15 / 16 / 17

Un ONTD Original: Nueve Telenovelas de México that were Underrated

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“Preciosa” — (1998)

Descripción: A humble disabled girl named Preciosa Ruiz (Irán Castillo) dreams of becoming a circus star. She then falls in love with a doctor (Mauricio Islas) who is engaged to Preciosa's evil half-sister Valeria (Nailea Norvind), both of whom are unaware they're even half-sisters to begin with. The circus folk and Mamá Pachis (Leyenda Carmen Salinas) watch after her to protect Preciosa from the evil Ring Master, Sandor (Roberto Ballesteros).



“Mi Pequeña Traviesa” — (1997)

Descripción: Julia (Michelle Vieth) is a high school graduate who dumps her gangster boyfriend, Mercurio (Khotan Fernandez). Her father is then crippled in a hit-and-run, forcing her to become the family's main provider. She gets a job with a tailor but only after disguising herself as a boy - Julio - to obtain that job. Her new work takes her into the high society world of a young lawyer & aspiring director named Alberto (Héctor Soberón). Her childhood friend, Juan Felipe (Mauricio Islas) also falls in love with Julia. She tries to balance her new job and three suitors competing for her love. As if being torn between two lovers (and a very jealous Mercurio) wasn't enough, she then has to deal with the antics of Deborah (Arleth Terán) and Barbara (Mariana Seoane). These two ladies are obsessed with Alberto and Juan, respectively.


“La Mentira” — (1997)

Descripción: La Mentira (translated The Lie) tells the story of Demitrio Azunsolo (Guy Ecker). He goes searching for his half-brother, Ricardo Platas (Rodrigo Abed) in a remote Mexican village. He is crushed to learn that Ricardo has died. After questioning the villagers, Demitrio learns that Ricardo committed suicide after being scorned by an ex-lover. After investigating, Demitrio comes to the conclusion that this heartless woman lives in the villa of the wealthy businessman Teodoro Fernandez-Negrete (Eric del Castillo). Obsessed in his plan to avenge his brother’s death, Demitrio travels to Mexico City and meets Virginia (Karla Álvarez) and Veronica Fernandez-Negrete (Kate del Castillo), Teodoro’s beautiful nieces. Virginia is sweet and soft spoken while Veronica is vivacious and exuberant. Demitrio’s first impressions lead him to blame Veronica for his brother’s death. Unfortunately, his allegations are unfounded and both Demitrio and Veronica find out that Virginia’s innocence is all a façade to mask her diabolical schemes.


“María Isabel” — (1997)

Descripción: María Isabel is one of the few telenovelas that focuses on the life of an indigenous female protagonist and her community. María Isabel (Adela Noriega) is a young woman of indigenous descent, faced with the responsibility of raising Rosa Isela, the orphaned daughter of her best friend. She finds employment at the home of Ricardo Mendiola (Fernando Carrillo), a rich widower, and his young daughter, Gloria. Ricardo’s kindness and decency cause Isabel to fall in love with him, though she keeps it a secret for many years. Ricardo's young daughter, Gloria, influences María Isabel's young one, Rosa Isela, to feel ashamed of her "Indian" mother María Isabel. The ungrateful Rosa Isela then abandons Isabel to live with her wealthy grandfather. Shortly soon after, Ricardo realizes that he is falling in love with her and asks María Isabel to be his wife. The happiness is short lived however as many more obstacles come between them.


“Volver a Empezar” — (1994)

Descripción: Volver a Empezar (translated Start Again) tells the story of Renata “Reny” Jiménez (Yuri or Yuridia Valenzuela-Canseco), a Latin pop star who has adoring fans, is rich and has a family that loves her. Unfortunately Reny's sister, Sandra (Claudia Silva) and Reny's husband, Santiago (Rafael Sánchez Navarro), are not exactly fond of her. Santiago wants her money and Sandra wants her fame. Sandra arranges an accident that paralyzes Reny from the waist down, keeping her from performing, and with the help of Santiago, she disappears from the limelight, penniless. Reny however doesn't exactly love her husband anyways, and falls in love with her manager, Tony (Guillermo Garcia Cantú). Also in love with her are: Chayanne (as himself), a famous Puerto Rican pop star; Lalo (Fernando Ciangherotti) a poor, aspiring musician; and the doctor who is trying to cure her paralysis. Unfortunately, love cannot stop the twisted plan by Sandra and Santiago to get what they want from Reny, making it almost impossible for her to begin again.


“La Otra” — (2002)

Descripción: La Otra (translated La Usurpadora 2.0 The Other Woman) is about two women, Carlota and Cordelia (Yadhira Carrillo) who are physically identical, but on the inside are complete opposites. Carlota has grown up in a world dominated by her mother, Bernada (Jacqueline Andere), who emotionally abuses her and her older sister, Eugenia (Mercedes Molto). Cordelia has grown up in a little town surrounded by farms and ranches and is obsessed with wealth and power and will stop at nothing to get it. Eugenia gets pregnant out of wedlock, faced by embarrassment Bernada sends her to a small town, the town in which Cordelia resides. Carlota starts dating a doctor named Alvaro (Juan Soler) and falls in love. However, her mother Bernada won't allow it, because if any of her daughters get married, Bernada will have to give them each their inheritance which is everything Bernada has. When Eugenia dies shortly after giving birth, their mother Bernada uses this to her advantage and makes Alvaro believe it was Carlota who had passed away (he was not aware she had a sister) when he see's a closed casket at their home, thus breaking his heart. Alvaro believes Carlota has died and Carlota believes Alvaro has abandoned her. Years later as fate would have it, Carlota and Cordelia would meet and exchange places for Cordelia's daughter's sake. Carlota disguised as Cordelia would then fall in love with Alvaro all over again - unaware of the truth that he never left her. More lies and deceit would unfold in this story known as, La Otra.


“Rencor Apasionado” — (1998)

Descripción: Rencor Apasionado (translated Burning Resentment) tells the story of heiress Karina Rangel (Natalia Esperón) who suffers a nervous breakdown after the death of her parents and brother, and when she wakes up she finds herself in a psychiatric hospital, locked up by her step-sister, Mariana (Magda Karina), who wants to seize her money. Germán, a faithful employee of Karina, arrives at a plan to free her from the asylum and tormenting of her sister: marriage. With the help of two lawyers, a marriage of convenience is arranged between Karina and Mauricio Gallardo (Eduardo Santamarina), a young man whose family is on the verge of bankruptcy. She would secure her freedom and he would raise money to save his family's fortune. But Karina is only told that Mauricio is willing to marry her to help her, and after they give her his picture, and believing that he must have a heart of gold, she falls in love with him. Mauricio, on the other hand, is never informed that the rich heiress is locked up in an asylum. In fact, the only reason why he agreed to marry her is because his girlfriend, the beautiful and ambitious Mayte Monteverde (Aracely Arámbula) despised him when he discovered that his family no longer had money. Already furious, he is repulsed by the haggard appearance of Karina and has a grudge even after he says “I Do.” Mauricio goes on a trip, but a year later, his wife has become a beautiful woman, one who now has the same resentment for his rejection.


“Caminos Cruzados” — (1995)

Descripción: Caminos Cruzados (translated Crossroads) tells the story of Patricia (Mariana Levy), a sensitive and intelligent woman, begins to work in the firm of Ambrosio and César Augusto (father and son). Both fall in love with her, but Cesar Augusto (Ariel López Padilla) breaks off his relationship with his girlfriend, Valeria (Tania Helfgott) and marries her. Patricia and César Augusto will separate during a snowing accident. Years later however, they will meet again having completely different lives: she is a hard-working woman and he is married to another woman.


“Sin Ti” — (1997)

Descripción: Sin Ti (translated Without You) is about Sagrario Molina (Gabriela Rivero) is a Biology teacher in a private school for young ladies and in her free time she attends a hostel for children with cancer. With her lives his widowed sister, Leonor, and her two nephews, Pablo and Lupita. At school he meets Luis David Luján, (René Strickler) a journalist who starts teaching literature at school. Love begins to emerge between Sagrario and Luis David, who are forced to marry to avoid a scandal that could ruin the career of Luis David, since Maria Elena Ysaguirre (Adamari López), a capricious and untamable student of very good economic position has become deeply obsessed with the teacher Luis. Maria Elena finally manages to get the couple separated, since it causes them to be discovered kissing, so that Sagrario and Luis David divorce. Shortly after, Sagrario begins to be courted by Guillermo Ysaguirre (Roberto Vander), the father of Maria Elena. Although he feels only a friendly appreciation for him, Sagrario decides to marry him, as Leonor suddenly dies and Sagrario has to take care of the two children. However, Sagrario finds herself in a very uncomfortable situation when Guillermo takes her home, since Maria Elena and Luis David are living together there. Aware that his true love is Sagrario, Luis David feels betrayed when he discovers that she is pregnant, without suspecting that the father of the daughter of Sagrario is himself.




ONTD, qué telenovelas de México o de otro país fueron tus favoritas?


Sources: Me y 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

ONTD Original: 10 Series Españolas to watch on Netflix

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La Casa de Papel (Money Heist)



PLOT: A mysterious man, who goes by the name of El Profesor ("The Professor"), is planning the biggest heist ever to occur. In order to carry out the ambitious plan, he recruits a gang of eight people with certain abilities who have nothing to lose. The goal is to enter the Royal Mint of Spain and print 2.4 billion euros. In order to do this, they need eleven days of seclusion, during which they will have to deal with sixty-seven hostages and the elite forces of the police.

La Casa De Papel just became the most watched non-English series on Netflix ever.


Vis A Vis (Locked Up)



PLOT: Macarena Ferreiro is a young naive woman who falls in love with her boss and, because of him, commits several accounting manipulation and misappropriation crimes. She is accused of four tax crimes, and consequently she is imprisoned at the Cruz del Sur Prison as a precautionary measure with very high bail set. She has to face the emotional shock that being in jail means to her, as well as the complicated relationship between the inmates; among them Zulema stands out as the most dangerous prisoner. In prison Macarena will soon realize the chance to survive the projected seven-year sentence she will likely receive if convicted depends on changing, evolving and becoming a very different person. Meanwhile, in order to pay the bail, her family outside gets involved in finding a large sum of money hidden somewhere, in dispute with Zulema's boyfriend, who will lead the Ferreiros to a terrible situation.


Las Chicas del Cable (Cable Girls)



PLOT: In 1928, a modern telecommunications company begins to operate in Madrid. The series tells the turn in life that four young women take when they start working for this company. The four of them feel attached in different ways, to their families, their partners, or their memories. Part of the focus of the show is the hardships working women faced in the 1920s.


Velvet



PLOT: The main storyline of the show is the love story of Alberto Márquez, heir of Galerías Velvet, one of the most prestigious fashion houses in the Spain of the late 1950s, and Ana Rivera, who works as a seamstress there.


Merlí



PLOT: Merlí Bergeron is an unemployed Philosophy teacher who, after being evicted from his apartment, is forced to live with his mother. He also will have to take care of his son Bruno, who until then was living with his mother, Merlí's ex-wife. After Bruno arrives, Merlí is hired in Àngel Guimerà High School. There, with his unpredictable and unorthodox methods, Merlí will make the students think and express their opinions, and also will help them with his problems, even in a censurable way. He will not only explain about Socrates, Schopenhauer, Hume or Nietzsche, but also will apply their ideas and teachings to solve the problems he finds.


El Barco (The Ship)



PLOT: A global cataclysm, caused by a fatal accident in Geneva, Switzerland, during the implementation of a particle accelerator, leaves the crew and students of the barque school-ship Estrella Polar (Polar Star) isolated in a post-apocalyptic world where most of the world's land mass is now under water. The ship becomes their home in this isolated world. However, apart from the isolation, they also discover they are not alone, and must face "the others".


El Ministerio del Tiempo (The Ministry of Time)



PLOT: The Ministry of Time is the best kept secret of the Spanish state: an autonomous government institution that reports directly to the Prime Minister. Its patrols have to watch the doors of time so that no intruder from other eras can change history for their own benefit. The series follows the assignments of the Ministry's newest patrol: the one formed by Army of Flanders soldier Alonso de Entrerríos, 19th century student Amelia Folch and 21st century Samur paramedic Julián Martínez.


Gran Hotel (Grand Hotel)



PLOT: The events take place in 1906–1907 in Spain, near a town called Cantaloa. The working-class Julio Olmedo arrives at the luxurious Grand Hotel to visit his sister Cristina, who works there as a maid and who has recently been promoted to floor manager. Julio is told by a waiter that Cristina was fired for theft a month before, a story Julio does not believe. He is convinced something happened to her at the hotel and there was a coverup. He takes a job there as a waiter under the name Julio Espinosa to investigate his sister's disappearance. He soon finds an ally in Alicia Alarcón, one of the daughters of the hotel's owner Doña Teresa. Alicia, who is being forced to marry hotel manager Diego Murquía, is also suspicious of things happening at the hotel. Together Julio and Alicia work to uncover the secrets of the Grand Hotel.


Pulsaciones (Lifeline)



PLOT:Álex is a neurosurgeon who has received a heart transplant. His donor is an investigative journalist named Rodrigo whose death is shrouded in mystery. Shortly after the operation, Álex starts seeing Rodrigo's memories in the form of nightmares, which will lead to him trying to uncover the causes of his death. He will be joined in this by Lara Valle, an aspiring young journalist who was mentored by Rodrigo.


Mar de Plástico (Plastic Sea)



PLOT: On a hot night in Campoamargo, Almería, Ainhoa Sánchez, daughter of the town's mayor, heads to a date in the greenhouse area, known as the "Plastic Sea". Suddenly there is a power outage and Ainhoa is brutally attacked and killed in the dark. The next morning, the crops are watered by her blood and nobody knows anything about the disappeared girl. The same day, Héctor Aguirre, sergeant of the Civil Guard and chief of the Judicial Police, happens to arrive in Campoamargo and begins the crime investigation. A crime many people had reasons to commit, and few of them have alibis. Aguirre, a veteran of Afghanistan with severe anger management issues, knows he is in for the hardest investigation of his career.


sources: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / 16 / 17 / 18 / 19 / 20

15 upcoming May book releases [ONTD Original]

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Here are 15 upcoming May book releases to check out, because if you're like me, lately I spend more time thinking about what books to read than actually reading... All the authors are women, and while there are selections from various genres, they're mostly contemporary; hopefully a title or two piques your interest!

36950065The One Memory of Flora Banks by Emily Barr
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary
Expected publication: May 1st

Seventeen-year-old Flora Banks has no short-term memory. Her mind resets itself several times a day, and has since the age of ten, when the tumor that was removed from Flora's brain took with it her ability to make new memories. That is, until she kisses Drake, her best friend's boyfriend, the night before he leaves town. Miraculously, this one memory breaks through Flora's fractured mind, and sticks. Flora is convinced that Drake is responsible for restoring her memory and making her whole again. So, when an encouraging email from Drake suggests she meet him on the other side of the world--in Svalbard, Norway--Flora knows with certainty that this is the first step toward reclaiming her life.

But will following Drake be the key to unlocking Flora's memory? Or will the journey reveal that nothing is quite as it seems?


35887193The Perfect Mother by Aimee Molloy
FICTION > Thriller

Expected publication: May 1st

They call themselves the May Mothers—a collection of new moms who gave birth in the same month. Twice a week, with strollers in tow, they get together in Prospect Park, seeking refuge from the isolation of new motherhood; sharing the fears, joys, and anxieties of their new child-centered lives.

When the group’s members agree to meet for drinks at a hip local bar, they have in mind a casual evening of fun, a brief break from their daily routine. But on this sultry Fourth of July night during the hottest summer in Brooklyn’s history, something goes terrifyingly wrong: one of the babies is abducted from his crib. Winnie, a single mom, was reluctant to leave six-week-old Midas with a babysitter, but the May Mothers insisted that everything would be fine. Now Midas is missing, the police are asking disturbing questions, and Winnie’s very private life has become fodder for a ravenous media.

Though none of the other members in the group are close to the reserved Winnie, three of them will go to increasingly risky lengths to help her find her son. And as the police bungle the investigation and the media begin to scrutinize the mothers in the days that follow, damaging secrets are exposed, marriages are tested, and friendships are formed and fractured.

36204669Ship It by Britta Lundin
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary

LGBT
Expected publication: May 1st

Claire is a sixteen-year-old fangirl obsessed with the show Demon Heart. Forest is an actor on Demon Heart who dreams of bigger roles. When the two meet at a local Comic-Con panel, it's a dream come true for Claire. Until the Q&A, that is, when Forest laughs off Claire's assertion that his character is gay. Claire is devastated. After all, every last word of her super-popular fanfic revolves around the romance between Forest's character and his male frenemy. She can't believe her hero turned out to be a closed-minded jerk. Forest is mostly confused that anyone would think his character is gay. Because he's not. Definitely not.

Unfortunately for Demon Heart, when the video of the disastrous Q&A goes viral, the producers have a PR nightmare on their hands. In order to help bolster their image within the LGBTQ+ community-as well as with their fans-they hire Claire to join the cast for the rest of their publicity tour. What ensues is a series of colourful Comic-Con clashes between the fans and the show that lead Forest to question his assumptions about sexuality and help Claire come out of her shell. But how far will Claire go to make her ship canon? To what lengths will Forest go to stop her and protect his career? And will Claire ever get the guts to make a move on Tess, the very cute, extremely cool fanartist she keeps running into?

35750311Tiffany Sly Lives Here Now by Dana L. Davis
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary

Expected publication: May 1st

For sixteen-year-old Tiffany Sly, life hasn’t been safe or normal for a while. Losing her mom to cancer has her a little bit traumatized and now she has to leave her hometown of Chicago to live with the biological dad she’s never known.

Anthony Stone is a rich man with four other daughters—and rules for every second of the day. Tiffany tries to make the best of things, but she doesn’t fit into her new luxurious, but super-strict, home—or get along with her standoffish sister London. The only thing that makes her new life even remotely bearable is the strange boy across the street. Marcus McKinney has had his own experiences with death, and the unexpected friendship that blossoms between them is the only thing that makes her feel grounded.

But Tiffany has a secret. Another man claims he’s Tiffany’s real dad—and she only has seven days before he shows up to demand a paternity test and the truth comes out. With her life about to fall apart all over again, Tiffany finds herself discovering unexpected truths about her father, her mother and herself, and realizing that maybe family is in the bonds you make—and that life means sometimes taking risks.

34325090I Was Born For This by Alice Oseman
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary
LGBT

Expected publication: May 3rd

For Angel Rahimi, life is only about one thing: The Ark – a pop-rock trio of teenage boys who are currently taking the world by storm. Being part of The Ark’s fandom has given her everything – her friendships, her dreams, her place in the world.

Jimmy Kaga-Ricci owes everything to The Ark too. He’s their frontman – and playing in a band is all he’s ever dreamed of doing. It’s just a shame that recently everything in his life seems to have turned into a bit of a nightmare.

Because that’s the problem with dreaming – eventually, inevitably, real life arrives with a wake-up call. And when Angel and Jimmy are unexpectedly thrust together, they will discover just how strange and surprising facing up to reality can be.

36086513Amal Unbound by Aisha Saeed
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary
Expected publication:
May 8th

Life is quiet and ordinary in Amal's Pakistani village, but she had no complaints, and besides, she's busy pursuing her dream of becoming a teacher one day. Her dreams are temporarily dashed when--as the eldest daughter--she must stay home from school to take care of her siblings. Amal is upset, but she doesn't lose hope and finds ways to continue learning. Then the unimaginable happens--after an accidental run-in with the son of her village's corrupt landlord, Amal must work as his family's servant to pay off her own family's debt.

Life at the opulent Khan estate is full of heartbreak and struggle for Amal--especially when she inadvertently makes an enemy of a girl named Nabila. Most troubling, though, is Amal's growing awareness of the Khans' nefarious dealings. When it becomes clear just how far they will go to protect their interests, Amal realizes she will have to find a way to work with others if they are ever to exact change in a cruel status quo, and if Amal is ever to achieve her dreams.

2590136Barracoon: The Story of the Last Slave by Zora Neale Hurston
NONFICTION > History
Expected publication:
May 8th

In 1927, Zora Neale Hurston went to Plateau, Alabama, to interview ninety-five-year-old Cudjo Lewis. Of the millions of men, women, and children transported from Africa to America as slaves, Cudjo was then the only person alive to tell the story of this integral part of the nation’s history. Hurston was there to record Cudjo’s firsthand account of the raid that led to his capture and bondage fifty years after the Atlantic slave trade was outlawed in the United States.

In 1931, Hurston returned to Plateau, the African-centric community three miles from Mobile founded by Cudjo and other former slaves from his ship. Spending more than three months there, she talked in depth with Cudjo about the details of his life. During those weeks, the young writer and the elderly formerly enslaved man ate peaches and watermelon that grew in the backyard and talked about Cudjo’s past—memories from his childhood in Africa, the horrors of being captured and held in a barracoon for selection by American slavers, the harrowing experience of the Middle Passage packed with more than 100 other souls aboard the Clotilde, and the years he spent in slavery until the end of the Civil War.

Based on those interviews, featuring Cudjo’s unique vernacular, and written from Hurston’s perspective with the compassion and singular style that have made her one of the preeminent American authors of the twentieth-century, Barracoon brilliantly illuminates the tragedy of slavery and one life forever defined by it. Offering insight into the pernicious legacy that continues to haunt us all, black and white, this poignant and powerful work is an invaluable contribution to our shared history and culture.

37703411The Cemetery Keeper's Wife by Maryann McFadden
HISTORICAL FICTION > Mystery
Expected publication:
May 8th

Rachel Miller is on the cusp of a new life when she moves to Union Cemetery after marrying Adam, the 7th generation cemetery keeper. Though she's known him only twelve weeks, his tender love seems like a miracle of fate after her years alone.

On her first walk through the lush and silent grounds of her new home, Rachel discovers a stunning monument to Tillie Smith, who died in 1886. Reading the words carved into the stone, "She Died in Defence of Her Honor," Rachel is overcome by a powerful memory buried deep in her past.

A series of uncanny coincidences linked to Tillie Smith follows, setting Rachel on a journey that grows into an obsession: Why did the murder of a poor kitchen maid at the local seminary become a national sensation? Why were people in town trying to keep her from finding the truth? But most disturbing of all, why was Tillie reawakening a past Rachel chose to bury long ago. A past that could threaten her marriage.

34937311The Ensemble by Aja Gabel
FICTION > Contemporary
Expected publication:
May 15th

Brit is the second violinist, a beautiful and quiet orphan; the viola is Henry, a prodigy who’s always had it easy; the cellist is Daniel, the oldest, the angry skeptic who sleeps around; and on first violin is Jana, their flinty, resilient leader. Together, they are the Van Ness String Quartet.

In The Ensemble, each character picks up the melody, from the group’s youthful rocky start through to adulthood. As they navigate devastating failures and wild success, heartbreak and marriage, triumph and loss, betrayal and enduring loyalty, they are always tied together—by career, by the intensity of their art, by the secrets they carry together, and by choosing each other over and over again.

Following these four unforgettable characters, Aja Gabel’s debut novel gives a behind-the-scenes look into the highly competitive, mysterious world of high-level musicians. The story of Brit and Henry and Daniel and Jana, The Ensemble is a heart-skipping portrait of ambition, friendship, and the tenderness of youth.

22524101My So-Called Bollywood Life by Nisha Sharma
CONTEMPORARY > Romance
Expected publication:
May 15th

Winnie Mehta was never really convinced that Raj was her soulmate, but their love was written in the stars. Literally, a pandit predicted Winnie would find the love of her life before her 18th birthday, and Raj meets all of the qualifications. Which is why Winnie is shocked to return from her summer at film camp to find her boyfriend of three years hooking up with Jenny Dickens. Worse, Raj is crowned chair of the student film festival, a spot Winnie was counting on for her film school applications. As a self-proclaimed Bollywood expert, Winnie knows this is not how her perfect ending is scripted.

Then there’s Dev, a fellow film geek, and one of the few people Winnie can count on to help her reclaim control of her story. Dev is smart charming, and challenges Winnie to look beyond her horoscope to find someone she’d pick for herself. But does falling for Dev mean giving up on her prophecy, and her chance to live happily ever after? To get her Bollywood-like life on track, Winnie will need a little bit of help from fate, family, and of course, a Bollywood movie star.

32912154Paper Ghosts by Julia Heaberlin
FICTION > Mystery
Expected publication:
May 15th

Carl Louis Feldman is an old man who was once a celebrated photographer. That was before he was tried for the murder of a young woman and acquitted. Before his admission to a care home for dementia. Now his daughter has come to see him, to take him on a trip. Only she's not his daughter and, if she has her way, he's not coming back . . .

Because Carl's past has finally caught up with him. The young woman driving the car is convinced her passenger is guilty, and that he's killed other young women. Including her sister Rachel.

Now they're following the trail of his photographs, his clues, his alleged crimes. To see if he remembers any of it. Confesses to any of it. To discover what really happened to Rachel.

Has Carl truly forgotten what he did or is he just pretending? Perhaps he's guilty of nothing and she's the liar. Either way in driving him into the Texan wilderness she's taking a terrible risk. For if Carl really is a serial killer, she's alone in the most dangerous place of all . .

35901105The Brightsiders by Jen Wilde
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary
LGBT

Expected publication:
May 22nd

As a rock star drummer in the hit band The Brightsiders, Emmy King’s life should be perfect. But there’s nothing the paparazzi love more than watching a celebrity crash and burn. When a night of partying lands Emmy in hospital and her girlfriend in jail, she’s branded the latest tabloid train wreck.

Luckily, Emmy has her friends and bandmates, including the super-swoonworthy Alfie, to help her pick up the pieces of her life. She knows hooking up with a band member is exactly the kind of trouble she should be avoiding, and yet Emmy and Alfie Just. Keep. Kissing.

Will the inevitable fallout turn her into a clickbait scandal (again)? Or will she find the strength to stand on her own?

35068534Monday's Not Coming by Tiffany D. Jackson
YOUNG ADULT > Contemporary
Expected publication:
May 22nd

Monday Charles is missing, and only Claudia seems to notice. Claudia and Monday have always been inseparable—more sisters than friends. So when Monday doesn’t turn up for the first day of school, Claudia’s worried. When she doesn’t show for the second day, or second week, Claudia knows that something is wrong. Monday wouldn’t just leave her to endure tests and bullies alone. Not after last year’s rumors and not with her grades on the line. Now Claudia needs her best—and only—friend more than ever. But Monday’s mother refuses to give Claudia a straight answer, and Monday’s sister April is even less help.

As Claudia digs deeper into her friend’s disappearance, she discovers that no one seems to remember the last time they saw Monday. How can a teenage girl just vanish without anyone noticing that she’s gone?

36236148The Honey Farm by Harriet Alida Lye
FICTION > Thriller
Expected publication:
May 29th

The drought has discontented the bees. Soil dries into sand; honeycomb stiffens into wax. But Cynthia knows how to breathe life back into her farm: offer it as an artists’ colony with free room, board, and “life experience” in exchange for backbreaking labor. Silvia, a wide-eyed graduate and would-be poet, and Ibrahim, a painter distracted by constant inspiration, are drawn to Cynthia’s offer, and soon, to each other.

But something lies beneath the surface. The Edenic farm is plagued by events that strike Silvia as ominous: taps run red, scalps itch with lice, frogs swarm the pond. One by one, the other residents leave. As summer tenses into autumn, Cynthia’s shadowed past is revealed and Silvia becomes increasingly paralyzed by doubt. Building to a shocking conclusion, The Honey Farm announces the arrival of a bold new voice and offers a thrilling portrait of creation and possession in the natural world.


36425796Shelter in Place by Nora Roberts
FICTION > Suspense
Expected publication:
May 29th

Sometimes, there is nowhere safe to hide.

It was a typical evening at a mall outside Portland, Maine. Three teenage friends waited for the movie to start. A boy flirted with the girl selling sunglasses. Mothers and children shopped together, and the manager at the video-game store tending to customers. Then the shooters arrived.

The chaos and carnage lasted only eight minutes before the killers were taken down. But for those who lived through it, the effects would last forever. In the years that followed, one would dedicate himself to a law enforcement career. Another would close herself off, trying to bury the memory of huddling in a ladies' room, hopelessly clutching her cell phone--until she finally found a way to pour her emotions into her art.

But one person wasn't satisfied with the shockingly high death toll at the DownEast Mall. And as the survivors slowly heal, find shelter, and rebuild, they will discover that another conspirator is lying in wait--and this time, there might be nowhere safe to hide.

SOURCES 123456789101112131415
Book post!

HBD Victoria Beckham! - Here's 10 Deep Cuts and Unreleased Songs

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Fashion icon, feminist, and Spice Girl Victoria Beckham turns 44 today, and it was about 14 years ago she really ditched any more attempts to be a singer. She had mediocre success with her first self-titled album, however she recorded two albums that were scrapped later on due to poor single performance, a supposed falling out with producer Damon Dash when they attempted to make an 'urban' album, and being panned by critics. Posh-Legend V's music will not be forgotten, so here's 10 deep cuts and unreleased songs from her musical career.

10. (Generate) The Flow
Notes: Ha best BOP. This could've been a hit for her.


A bit of sweet seduction
Put your ass on the line
Sexual corruption
Is playing on my mind






9. 25 Minutes


25 minutes to go
I'm lost in the rain and I'm moving way too slow
To get to you
25 minutes to go
I can't find my way got the radio down low
Trying to talk to you




8. Midnight Fantasy
Notes: An adult lullaby.


I'm gonna take you places that you've never been before
I come into your dreams, make you beg for more
I´ll hold on to your body, I´ll give you what you need
Go deeper with me baby, I'm your midnight fantasy




7. Every Little Thing
Notes: Slayin Latin pop. Call up M*luma or Pitbull for a feature queen!


Every little thing that you say and do
Every little thing it makes me fall for you
No one can stop us tonight (tonight)
Every little thing that you do and say




6. Be With You
Notes: One of my favs!


Cause I only wanna be with
Only wanna be with
Only wanna be with youuuuuuuuu




5. My Love Is For Real


Do I need to say it?
You should know my love is for real




4. Right Back to You
Notes: Samples DeBarge's "A Dream", which was also used in "Don't Leave Me Now" by Blackstreet.


All I wanna DEW
Is come right back 2 U




3. Watcha Talkin Bout


Hit me on my
MOBILE
I'm a little
BUSY
Gotta a lot of people to call, OH

Watcha talkin''bout, I don't really hear it
'Cause you keep on fading out
You're not coming through, watcha gonna do
Watcha talkin''bout, who you think you're fooling
There's no way I'm hangin' out
With someone like you, watcha gonna do




2. Like That
Notes: Another single-worthy bop.


No is shouldn't be like THAT, not fooling ME
Damn his lovin' damn his LIES, they're buggin' ME
No it shouldn't be like that, he's trying to BE
Trippin' out like all the guys, why can't you SEEE?





1. Should Have Known Better
Notes: Another one of my favs.


I should've known better
Than to spend my life waiting for you
You know it's hard following after
When you treat me the way that you do





Listening post?


Sources: 12345678910 / me

ONTD Original: Lurlene McDaniel's 5 saddest books

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Teens today have their Harry Potters, their Twilights, their Obama/Trudeau fanfic. Well back in my day we didn't have those types of books. There was an interesting pocket of fiction pre-teen and teen girls loved in the mid-to-late 90s, and most of these books were written by one author: LURLENE MCDANIEL.

If you aren't familiar, Lurlene wrote a ton of books about teen girls. These books had one detail in common: they were all about straight white people. Ok, two things in common: EVERYONE DIED. These books were ALL about people with cancer and people in horrible accidents and everyone died and was miserable. Hearts were broken, lives were ruined before they had a chance to start, and we, the readers, LOVED IT.

All that being said, I have a few personal standouts from the collection. I bring you the 5 saddest books Lurlene McDaniel has written.




5. Till Death Do Us Part

18 year old April has been suffering from headaches and fainting spells and enters the hospital for testing. There she meets the handsome Mark Gianni, a 21 year old with cystic fibrosis. While they both have feelings for each other, April has a jerk of a boyfriend who ruins everything. When April learns the seriousness of her condition(inoperable brain tumor, obviously)everything changes. Will April and Mark get together?(Yes, duh)Will one of them die?(Yes, duh)Who won the beach vacation?(idk)


4. Six Months to Live (Dawn Rochelle #1)

At just 13, Dawn's diagnosed with leukemia. While going through treatment she meets another girl fighting cancer, Sandy. They both go into remission and all seems to be alright...until Sandy gets sick again. Will Sandy live?(Nope)Will Dawn's cancer come back?(Not in this book)


3. She Died Too Young (One Last Wish #9)

The One Last Wish series followed a group of girls with life-threatening illnesses, and while they were all really depressing this one really packed a punch. Chelsea is a teenager who needs a heart transplant to live. While waiting for her transplant she meets a girl named Jillian who also needs a heart transplant. So they're waiting for a heart that only one of them can get, and the other one will likely die. There's also a subplot with Chelsea wanting to bone Jillian's hot twin brother Josh but come on Lurlene, we have more important things to worry about.

Will Chelsea get a heart transplant?(Yup)What about Jillian?(Nope, RIP)Will Chelsea and Josh get together?(Who cares he sucks)


2. Don't Die, My Love

Julie and Luke are high school sweethearts who are madly in love and planning their future together. A happy young couple without a care in the world? Not in McDaniel's world. Luke comes down with a flu that won't go away(Cancer, obviously). What does this mean for the young couple's future?(NOT GOOD THINGS)


1. The Angels Series

As I always do when I make lists I'm completely cheating by putting a series on here. So while our girl Lurlene wrote some depressing stories, they all seem to end with kind of a "good things can come out of horrible situations" message. Not the motherfuckin' Angels trilogy, no sir. This series teaches you that everyone you care about will die and love isn't real and existence is pain.

Leah goes into the hospital with what she suspects is a broken finger, but finds out she has leukemia. While in the hospital her roommate is a little Amish girl named Rebekah. Rebekah has an older brother named Ethan who is FIIIIINE and Leah is all over. Then an angel randomly shows up and cures them but no one really cares about that lbr.

That all sounds nice and wholesome, right? Except after that first book everything explodes.Rebekah dies when she gets run over by a fucking TRACTOR, which shakes up the entire family. Ethan has his Rumspringa and moves in with Leah and her family, and they start seriously dating. Then Leah's stepfather gets diagnosed with terminal cancer because there wasn't enough cancer in this series, and right after the diagnosis Ethan decides he'd rather be Amish and goes home. Leah's stepfather dies, Leah's all sad about Ethan, no one is happy ever again. THE END.




Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Do you enjoy making yourself hopelessly sad for no reason ONTD? What were your favorite books as a teenager?

ONTD ORIGINAL: TV SHOWS WITH WASTED POTENTIAL

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TV SHOWS WITH WASTED POTENTIAL
tv-shows-montage
Commenting on a recent Younger post of mine about how the writing isn’t turning out the way it should, I came to thinking how many shows I’ve watched that I’ve been really excited about and thought they’d go one way but the writers were either incapable of writing a good storyline so they ran their previously very cool concept into the ground,  or they were listening to the loudest parts of fandom and trying to please everyone while forgetting their original concept, OR, and this one hurts the most, they WERE capable of writing a good show, but they haven’t been lucky enough to be on a normal network so they weren’t appreciated and promoted. When I start watching a show, I rarely stop watching it until its finale, but some shows just became too ridiculous to waste my time on, and some…well…didn’t last long enough for me to give up on them lmao
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Here are some of the examples:
1.The Vampire Diaries
What it could have been: A fun fantasy show about a strong-willed, smart girl with moral compass who falls for a vegan vampire, solving new mysteries and murders in the city, fighting bad vampires and other creatures while keeping that humanity within herself (you know, a more interesting version of Twilight with a main character who isn’t dumb), with an actual compelling villain that Damon should have been and was at some point, and for one the main girl NOT falling for someone who fucking killed her brother (but happened to be lucky since the dude was wearing a ring that will bring him back to life later, but Damon didn’t know that.) It would have been nice for a main character not to go against her word because of a dick but oh well….
What we got: A show where Julie Plec was living vicariously through Caroline who had to fuck every character on the show, and the whole show became about who’s fucking whom, when in first 2 seasons there were actual mysteries. People getting resurrected at every turn, no stakes etc. Also, the only black main character was neglected up until last season where she got somewhat of a storyline but in the end had to settle down with a tryhard like Enzo. Damon/Elena fandom was too loud and the writers instead of following their own vision for the show, kept trying to please them which ruined both of the characters in the process.
2.Arrow
What it could have been: A superhero show with a compelling storyline, great villains, strong female characters etc.
What we got: No chemistry between the leads, the female lead getting fridged instead of getting her own badass arc, whole season 3, Malcolm not dying when he should have, villains not staying dead, pathetic Deathstroke etc.
3.Selfie
What it could have been: A cute sitcom with a non-stereotypical Asian co-lead.
What we got: Cancellation.
4.Pretty Little Liars
What it could have been: An actually captivating teen mystery show with a hot lesbian main pairing.
What we got: Every possible shit you can imagine.
5.Impastor
What it could have been: What it actually was. A really funny and unique sitcom that makes you laugh out loud like most of the sitcoms (apart from B99) nowadays can’t.
What we got: Cancellation after a major fucking cliffhanger. Fuck you, TVLand.
6.Glee
What it could have been: A somewhat dark teen comedy with great singing and engaging storylines, doing what other shows were afraid of doing.
What we got: Darren Criss. (jk, we got much much worse)
7.Gossip Girl
What it could have been: A teen drama to fill the void the O.C left, but with better storylines, hotter characters and better fashion, centered around a female friendship.
What we got: Scumbags being rewarded for being scumbags and women being weak as fuck. Also launching of Ed Westwick’s shitty career.
8.The Originals
What it could have been: A period piece about an Original family of vampires strolling around being badass in great costumes.
What we got: A show centered around a whiny pony-drawing main character in modern times pining after blondes.
9.Suits
What it could have been: A show to fill the void Boston Legal left but with hotter main characters, more racially diverse cast and less misogyny.
What we got: A stupid soap opera with lawyers. (and I guess....a royal wedding??)
10.Once Upon A Time
What it could have been: A family friendly show with a well-crafted storylines that stay true to the fairytale characters they use, centered around a strong female character.
What we got: A nonsensical mess.
Honorable mentions: How I Met Your Mother, SMASH, The Gates, Supergirl, Teen Wolf, Legends of Tomorrow, Bad Teacher, Witches of East End, Telenovela, Misfits, Go On, Devious Maids, Dirty Sexy Money, Samantha Who, Pitch etc.

Obviously my memory is at this point a little foggy when it comes to all the storylines I hated on these shows but I’ve made this post to spark up a discussion, I’m fully aware not everyone will agree with my choices, so comment away about what you thought should have been done better and which shows had wasted potential, what were the worst storylines, where and why did the writers go wrong, without being rude, please.



source: my useless PhD in tv show watching

Indie Release Guide: April 20th [An ONTD Original]

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This week sees the arrival of I Feel Pretty, Super Troopers 2 (because 4/20, do you get it?!?), and Traffik in wide release. But this post is for the little guys - the movies that make your friends say "Why do you want to see that? I never heard of it".

Note that the movies listed are in their first week of limited release, so it may take them a few more weeks to show up in your local arthouse theater. Check out the posts from the past couple of weeks for more movies that may have just opened near you: Releases from April 13 + Releases from April 6


The Devil and Father Amorth



Stars: Father Gabriele Amorth
Director: William Friedkin (The Exorcist)
Genre: Documentary
Plot: Father Gabriele Amorth performs his ninth exorcism on an Italian woman.
What you should know: The director of The Exorcist decided he wanted to see an actual exorcism. Does anyone's head do a full 360? You'll have to watch to find out.


Godard Mon Amour



Stars: Louis Garrel, Stacy Martin, Bérénice Bejo, Micha Lescot
Director: Micheal Hazanavicius (The Artist)
Genre: Biography, Comedy, Drama
Plot: Paris 1967. Jean-Luc Godard, the leading filmmaker of his generation, is shooting La Chinoise with the woman he loves, Anne Wiazemsky, 20 years his junior. They are happy, attractive, in love. They marry. But the film's reception unleashes a profound self-examination. The events of May '68 will amplify this process, and the crisis that shakes the filmmaker. Deep-rooted conflicts and misunderstandings will change him irrevocably. Revolutionary, off-the-wall, destructive, brilliant, he will pursue his choices and his beliefs to the breaking point.
What you should know: Originally titled Le Redoutable, the film premiered at Cannes 2017 and was nominated for the Palme d'Or. Jean-Luc Godard called the film a "stupid, stupid idea".


Corbin Nash



Stars: Corey Feldman, Malcolm McDowell, Bruce Davison, Rutger Hauer
Director: Ben Jagger (The Paddy Lincoln Gang)
Genre: Action, Horror, Thriller
Plot: Set in a bloodthirsty Los Angeles, one rogue detective's obsessive search for the truth behind his parents' murders leads him to confront a monstrous duo of Queeny and Vince who drag him into a hellish nightmare he was never prepared for. Lost to an underworld of horrors dating back to the dawn of time, he soon discovers that he is actually the last surviving member of the Nash family, a historic clan of demon hunters. As he is forced to acknowledge a foreboding destiny, he is attacked and brutally left for dead, only to be recovered by Macy, a pure soul who is led by the mysterious Blind Prophet. At last, Detective Nash is reborn the ultimate killer. Seeking vengeance he wages a violent war on the Beasts that roam the darkness of this world, finally embracing his true legacy - CORBIN NASH, Demon Hunter.
What you should know: It's rated TV-MA(?) but also has a (very limited) theatrical release.


Little Pink House



Stars: Catherine Keener, Jeanne Tripplehorn, Callum Keith Rennie, Miranda Frigon
Director: Courtney Balaker
Genre: Drama
Plot: A small-town nurse named Susette Kelo emerges as the reluctant leader of her working-class neighbors in their struggle to save their homes from political and corporate interests bent on seizing the land and handing it over to Pfizer Corporation.
What you should know: This is Courtney Balaker's first feature film. It won a couple of awards at last year's Santa Barbara International Film Festival and several other small film festivals, and is based on a true story.


Wanderland



Stars: Tate Ellington, Tara Summers, Victoria Clark, Harris Yulin
Director: Josh Klausner (The 4th Floor)
Genre: Adventure, Comedy, Musical
Plot: Seeking an escape from his isolated life in New York City, Alex accepts a mysterious invitation to house sit a picturesque 'Enchanted Cottage' on Long Island. There he ends up lost on a surreal musical all-night odyssey of misadventures.
What you should know: It's also available via VOD.


Love & Bananas



Stars: Ashley Bell, Noi Na, Lek Chailert
Director: Ashley Bell
Genre: Documentary, Action, Adventure
Plot: A heartwarming and hopeful story about a team of elephant rescuers, led by world renowned Asian elephant conservationist Lek Chailert, as they embark on a daring 48-hour mission 500 miles across Thailand to rescue a 70-year old captive blind Asian elephant and bring her to freedom. The touching story exposes the plight of Asian elephants and the people who work tirelessly to save them.
What you should know: This is actress Ashley Bell's directorial debut. She has starred in films such as Novitiate and The Last Exorcism.

Some weeks are better than others for indie film releases. Feel free to talk about any movies you're planning to see or have seen recently!

ONTD Original: 4 Times Bisexual Celebrities Called Themselves Gay + 4 Times They Didn't

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Responsible for the title of this post, Kristen Stewart may have the most internet-famous gay AF moment. Despite a public history of hetero relationships (even derailing her career by sleeping with the married male director of her film Snow White & The Huntsman), Stewart claimed the gay label during her SNL opening monologue in 2017. Lest you worry about invalidating her ⭐lesbianism, she does identify as bisexual.

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Cynthia Nixon has made a lot of statements about her sexuality. Though she admits that "the technically precise term for [her] orientation is bisexual" (and once believed "we’re all bisexual”), she now shies away from the word, claiming that lesbians get more respect for their same-sex attraction than bisexual women do. Cynthia, who has also called herself "gay as a political stance," continues to use the lesbian moniker in her campaign for governor of New York.

I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line "I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is better." And they tried to get me to change it because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people it’s not, but for me, it’s a choice, and you don't get to define my gayness for me.

I am very annoyed about this issue. Why can't it be a choice? Why is that any less legitimate? I don't pull out the "bisexual" word because nobody likes the bisexuals. Everybody likes to dump on the bisexuals... We get no respect.

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Bethany Meyers is a self-identified lesbian who recently wed actor Nico Tortorella, her male romantic and sexual partner of 11 years. They have been together since Bethany was 16 years old and consider one another each others' husbands and wives. In September 2017, the couple appeared on the cover of The Advocate with the headline "Yes, This Is a Queer Family."



Bonus. Nico identifies as bisexual and genderqueer. On whether 'pansexual' would be a more accurate label: "The B in LGBTQ+ has been fought for, for so long. I’m not going to be the person that’s like, ‘No, I need a P, I need another letter!’ I stand by people that have paved this way for somebody like me.”

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Michael Stipe considers himself "80% gay," someone who is attracted to both men and women but prefers men most of the time. “I hate and refuse to apply the term bisexual to myself. It doesn’t seem appropriate. It feels like just another label.”

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At the other end of the spectrum, Michelle Rodriquez made a point to distance herself from the lesbian label after being included on the cover of Curve without her knowledge (which many fans took as her coming out). She said the misconception that she's gay could hurt her career.

There are certain things that can close doors between a celebrity and certain audiences…If I were Ellen [DeGeneres] I may get away with the ‘I’m gay’ level of exposure, but I’m not a comedian, I like men (real ones anyway) and I’ve only been in this business for seven years, not 20.

Michelle later came out as bisexual, saying "Eventually it's going to wrinkle up and I won't be able to use it. I wanted to be honest about who I am and see what happens."

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Queen Gillian Anderson, proud bisexual, speculated that her experience as a young woman was easier than a lesbian girl's because she still had a place in hetero society.

I was in a relationship with a girl for a long time when I was in high school... If I had thought I was 100% gay, would it have been a different experience for me? Would it have been a bigger deal if shame had been attached to it and all those things that become huge life-altering issues for youngsters in that situation? It’s possible that my attitude around it came, on some level, from knowing that I still liked boys.

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It wasGore Vidal'sfamily that insisted on labeling him gay despite his identifying as bisexual. In this case, though, his family may have been right. Vidal, who was born in 1925, believed'gay' could only be used to describe sex acts and not a person's identityor orientation. For someone of his generation, 'gay' referred only to men perceived as weak because of their 'femininity' (including being the penetrated partner); Vidal was a socially and physically powerful man who reportedly always topped.

Classical history major side note: This is somewhat similar to the ancient Greek understanding of sexual orientation: classification is based on giving/receiving or dom/sub in sex acts rather than on the sex(es) involved.

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Like Vidal's family,Cara Delevingne's friends insist on calling her gay when she is in a same-sex relationship. Cara rejects the label, though, saying: "Once I spoke about my sexual fluidity, people were like, 'So you’re gay.' And I’m like, 'No, I’m not gay.'"

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*For the sake of simplicity, I've included anyone who has relationships with both men and women, even if they identify as pansexual, queer, or label-free.

Margaret Cho. "I just can't decide, I just want to have sex with everybody. [...] Of course, I've had relationships with women, but my politics are more queer than my lifestyle." (Cho is also poly.)

Bai Ling. Before she was fluent in English: "My name is pronounced 'bi,' so when I was asked, 'Are you bi?' I said, 'Yes, I am Bai.' Later I found out what it means, and I said, 'Sure, I am bi!'"

Evan Rachel Wood. "This is part of who I am, and I'm old enough to really know who I am by now."

Azealia Banks. "I can't be homophobic because I'm bisexual."

Drew Barrymore. "Do I like women sexually? Yes, I do. Totally. I think a woman and a woman together are beautiful, just as a man and a woman together are beautiful."

Tila Tequila. "I was the first one to put out a TV show about bisexuality...right after season 2, Katy Perry made “I Kissed a Girl” and then everybody was kissing girls and then Ellen came out and everybody started coming out, slowly. It became a topic of conversation. You don’t have to like me but I did it first."

Demi Lovato. "All of my songs are based off of personal experiences. I don't think there's anything wrong with experimentation at all."

Andy Dick. Calls himself 'try-sexual' ("I'll try anything once"). "Both [the gay and straight communities] want to push me gay."

Fergie."I think women are beautiful. I've had a lot of fun with women, and I'm not ashamed of it. The problem is that I also love a well-endowed man."

Zoe Saldana."As of today, I've been attracted to the male species, but if one day I wake up and want to be with a woman, I will do that because it is my life, therefore it is my decision."

Snooki. Considers herself bisexual, but says, "I would never be with a girl because I like...penis."

Billie Joe Armstrong. "Not sure if [he is] still bisexual" despite lots of past romantic/sexual relationships with both men and women.

Saffron Burrows. “If I was going to make a broad generalization, I’d say that I prefer the company of women. ...For a woman to say she has had a dalliance with another woman is quite trendy these days, but I do not like that trendiness. Life isn’t about dalliances – it’s about individuals. You come across people in your life that you find very interesting. It’s not about something flighty."

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More celebs on our team:
Besse Smith | Angelina Jolie | David Bowie | Clive Davis | Janis Joplin | Sir Alec Guinness | Kesha | Anna Paquin | Sia | Lady Gaga | Vanessa Carlton | Bella Thorne | Pete Townshend | Aaron Carter | Ani DiFranco | Frenchie Davis | Miley Cyrus | Kathleen Hanna (Julie Ruin) | Amanda Palmer | Adrianne Curry | Dave Davies | Meshell Ndegeocello | Amber Rose | Jillian Michaels | Joan Baez | Rachel Williams | Jane Wiedlin | Kathy Najimy | Carrie Brownstein | Orlando Jordan | Kate Pierson | Sapphire | Joe Dallesandro | Bif Naked | Miranda July | Mike White | Brian Molko | Iyari Limón | Alan Cumming | Amber Heard | and even more on Wikipedia


Source: My encyclopedic knowledge of my fellow Bs and this list.

Do you appropriate labels, ONTD?

ONTD Original: Eight “Work” Anthems from Your Faves Part II

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It was 2016, Rihanna and Drake's “Work” had just spent its eighth week at no. 1. Before the success however, ONTD was skeptical and thought it was going to flop. I know, I know, it was wild. Due to the song's massive success at the time, I had brought to your attention eight otherWork themed songs and rated them. Sometime has passed since then and now there are new songs that fit that theme as well as past songs I had forgotten or left off the first list (one purposely tbh - #SorryNotSorryIggy). So, let's do it again and rate eight more work based songs. Once again, this OP will grade each “Work” song with a rating of 1 to 5 based on a combination of song/anthem quality (65%), chart success (10%), and lbr my own self bias (25%). ❤

RuPaul — “Supermodel (You Better Work)”

Released: 1993
Album: Supermodel of the World
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: 39
UK Singles Chart: 52
Stand Out Lyrics:
Once upon a time, there was a little black girl
In the brust of projects of Detroit, Mexico
At fifteen, she was spotted by an Ebony Fashion Fair talent scout
And her modeling career took off, you better work


Rating (5 out of 5 hammers - it's a damn classic):





J. Cole — “Work Out”

Released: 2011
Album: Cole World: The Sideline Story
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: 13
Canadian Hot 100 Chart: 32
Stand Out Lyrics:
Straight up, now tell me
Do you really wanna love me forever? (oh oh oh)
Or is it just a hit-and-run?
(Work out for me, work out for me)


[basically that Paula Abdul sample]

Rating (4 out of 5 hammers):




Zac Efron, Baby V and the HSM2 Cast — “Work This Out”

Released: 2007
Album: High School Musical 2 (Soundtrack)
Billboard 200 Album Peak: 1
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: n/a
UK Singles Chart: n/a
Stand Out Lyrics:
We've got to work, work
There'll be no doubt
We can still save the summer
If we work this out


[groundbreaking]

Rating (3 out of 5 hammers):


lol, wut. why?




Nadine Coyle — “Go To Work”

Released: 2017
Album: n/a
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: n/a
UK Singles Downloads Chart: 57
Scotland (Official Charts Company): 52
Stand Out Lyrics:
Why don’t you go to work?
Do your nine to five
Gotta treat me right
You need to earn your stripes
Why don’t you do your thing?
Bring the money home
Just like mama done


Rating (3 out of 5 hammers):






Alex Aiono — “Work the Middle”


Released: 2017
Album: n/a
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: n/a
UK Singles Chart: n/a
Stand Out Lyrics:
Come and meet me at the afterparty
Bring your body, mama work the middle
Just a little don't tell nobody
Bring your body, mama work the middle


Rating (2 out of 5 hammers):




Majid Jordan — “Make it Work”

Released: 2016
Album: Majid Jordan
Billboard 200: 69
Billboard Hot 100 Peak: n/a
Stand Out Lyrics:
I've been having lots of troubles here lately
I don't wanna do these things but you make me (You do)
Something in my heart feels vacant
I can't even pretend, no, I won't even pretend


Rating (4 out of 5 hammers):




Kanye West — “The New Workout Plan”

Released: 2004
Album: The College Dropout
Billboard Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs Chart: 59
UK Singles Chart: n/a
Stand Out Lyrics:
You just popped in the Kanye West
Get right for the summer workout tape
And ladies if you follow these instructions exactly
You might bear to pull you a rapper, a NBA player
Man, at least a dude wit' a car


Rating (4 out of 5 hammers):




ZHU x Skrillex x THEY. — “Working For It”

Released: 2015
Album: Genesis Series
Billboard Hot 100 Chart: n/a
UK Singles Chart: n/a
Stand Out Lyrics:
You've been working here all night long
Let me see if I can give you better
Even when I'm far and gone
I know you're working for it


Rating (4 out of 5 hammers):





Part I
Before you rightfully drag me, make sure your fave isn't already in the first list.


Sources: Me & 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

ONTD Exclusive: TVGuide f*cked up and spoiled Jane The Virgin's finale HUGE cliffhanger.

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So, Jane The virgin's season finale premieres tonight, yet someone in TVGuide royally effed up and posted the recap ahead of time... they left the post up enough time for my Feedly to catch it...



Now, the post has already been taken down, but if you see the URL of the post you can see the cliffhanger... MICHAEL's ALIVE!!!


Michael, Jane's husband, was killed last season after he had heart complications with his bullet surgery.



The post was up enough for someone else to catch it and share the same link on twitter:



The post has been taken down, TVGuide has said nothing.


Source: Me, my feedly, my friend who has a bike, youtube, this guy's tweet and TVGuide i guess...

Narrator's voice: OMG, just like a telenovela!!
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